Infertility: Part 1

Infertility can be difficult to discuss. Infertility to me is a reminder that even the best people suffer hard challenges. Infertility requires patience, endurance, and hope. I recently had a friend ask me questions about our infertility journey and I always found hope in reading about others infertility experiences, so this is my story.

I think infertility can be a really ugly place, especially if you haven’t had any children yet. I clearly have a beautiful healthy biological boy now but I spent many years dreaming and crying of being a stay at home mom, not having to work and playing with a baby all day. I always imaged a family of at least four children.

I never really thought that I would have a hard time getting pregnant. Kelly and I were three years into our marriage when we started trying to conceive. After a year of having no success I went to see my OBGYN, she suggested I have some tests done including a Hysterosalpingogram (dye test) and laparoscopic surgery since I have such bad cramps. The dye test was the most painful thing I have ever experienced its way up there with jaw surgery and childbirth. The dye test showed that my tubes were open and my uterus is tilted to the left. A few weeks later I had laparoscopic surgery; finally a diagnosis endometriosis.

Since I was I teenager I suffered with really bad menstrual cramps. I remember coming home from school almost every month throwing up and in so much pain. I went on birth control pills at 14; which was the only thing that seemed to help. I still suffer with bad cramps. My OB was positive that if I went on Clomid (a medication that stimulates ovulation) that I would get pregnant. Six months later, still not pregnant. I was so frustrated and hopeless at the time. I had felt that my sincere prayers had gone unanswered and it was surely my fault. To be continued….